I didn’t have to go for an anonymous donor, I am free to take another choice!
After a long and complicated history, I had finally decided to become a single mom. I thought I would to do this with an anonymous sperm donor, I was already taking steps towards the medical proces. But in fact it felt difficult for me to do this. For that reason I started this coaching programme, for this grieving proces.
But during the coaching programme I started realising what makes it so difficult for me to choose for an anonymous donor.
And most of all, I learned that there are a lot of other choices! I didn’t have to go for an anonymous donor, I am free to take another choice! Viki showed me alternatives ways and my decision-making proces was broadened.
And then, to my surprise, I found a known sperm donor very quickly. This feels good.
It was very nice to work with somebody who works very specifically and unbiased around this subject.
The programme helped me to take goal-oriented steps.
I was struggling with my journey to being a single parent. Time kept ticking on mercilessly (I was soon going to turn 40). I was stuck with questions about my age, the selfishness of my wanting to have a child, letting go of the perfect picture and about the pressure that I was very much feeling.
This programme taught me to be kinder to and less critical of myself and to let go of things over which I have no control. I became aware that every desire to have a child is selfish and that it need not be perfect to be beautiful.
The programme helped me to take goal-oriented steps to address the issues that caused pain. It actually addresses all matters that are important. I found it very complete.
Now worries do not easily get a look-in. I have more peace of mind and can examine my wanting to have a child from a different point of view.
I am proud of myself for having looked for this support when I needed it.
Femke (fictitious name for privacy reasons)
Before, I was taking decisions that felt wrong or was taking no decisions. Now that is not the case anymore.
After long years of trying and- what felt to me as- failing, I found it very difficult to cope with feelings of guilt. It had also become difficult to communicate with the people around me.
This guidance brought me awereness about the past, the present and the future. I took back the control over the treatment with egg donation. I was able to move forward with this ‘plan B’ and see it as a valuable option, not as a failure.
I started communicating again regarding this topic.
Before, I was taking decisions that felt wrong or was taking no decissions. I felt lost and alone. Now that is not the case anymore.
Marta en John (43)
The coaching programme brought me acceptance of single motherhood.
I started this programma because I found it difficult to let go of my dream: having children with a partner. I was also longing for rest and structure in my head.
During the coaching programme, I discovered patterns in my family system who were very enlightening to me: the reasons why I will be doing this alone are more clear to me now.
I also learned to look at myself in a different way. I started realising that I can be a lot more self-confident, also in this matter.
This coaching programma brought me acceptance of single motherhood. I don’t choose for “security”, but there are no securities, no truths. It is OK now, because I am standing firmly behind my choice now. I realise more then ever how important this is, so that I won’t pass my own doubts on to my child.
In the 1-1 sessions I felt very understood, that was so nice.
The book of inspiration offers a lot of valuable tools for between the sessions. They made me look at myself and my choice in a positive way. This book is also a nice way of looking back at this process.
I now stand 100% behind my choice.
I was stuck worrying about possibly becoming a single mother. Very practical: combining it with my busy job and hobbies, etc. I was also confronted with the major dilemma: am I still going to wait for a partner or not?
Viki helped me face reality (I don’t have the time to wait anymore, I cannot delay making a decision any longer), to look within myself, to convert my worries into possibilities, to see my desires and not only my fears.
At times it was very confrontational and emotional, but I was given the tools I needed and the odd push here and there to take the plunge myself in a safe environment.
I am glad I completed this programme because I am now ready to take that step and stand 100% behind my choice to have a child on my own.
I found the strength to make the choices that feel right.
My fertility process dominated my life and my relationship.
What’s more, I had to make the difficult choice of switching to egg donation.
I could no longer see the wood for the trees.
Thanks to the programme with Viki, I found peace of mind and rediscovered what I feel to be important. I found the strength to make the choices that feel right.
I strongly recommend the programme.
We used methods that revealed much more than simply talking would have.
Because of this support programme, I became aware of insights about myself of which I was aware but did not realise what a negative affect they had on my wanting to have a child and the way I performed. I worked on those insights. And booked results.
Viki was an exceptionally good listener and always made sure that I became aware of certain insights on my own. This made me become all the more aware of them. We also used methods that revealed much more than simply talking would have.
I am now more at peace in relation to the process and can more readily talk about it with the people around me.
I arrived at important insights about things that I never realised were holding me back in this story.
I was having difficulties in dealing with what I felt were failures. The reactions from my environment also played tricks on me.
The programme made me realise that I am so much more than simply a women who does not yet have a child. I also came to realise that I was delaying a lot of things in my life in the expectation of a child.
Now I procrastinate much less; I now finally plan things in my life. I have begun to think of myself again. I am much better at dealing with the opinions of others too. I began to look at myself much more critically, arriving at important insights about things that I never realised were holding me back in this story. Small things with great impact.
I will not let go of anything that the support programme has brought me.
I became reacquainted with myself, my thoughts and my expectations.
The support programme has made me stronger mentally. The exercises we did helped me become reacquainted with myself, my thoughts and my expectations. I also learned to see the bigger picture: who I am and which roles I play in my life and how I am part of a larger family system. This has given me more resilience and acceptance.
Looking back, I am so glad I took the step to participate in this support programme.