You would easily trade your succesful life for (another) child

You would easily trade your succesful life for (another) child

Your quest for a child

An unfulfilled child wish after the age of forty? As a professionally successful woman (manager/ medical or legal profession/ politician or top civil servant/ expat/ academic/ entrepreneur/…) you did not choose this scenario. Contrary to what others often think.

Life – including your career and perhaps the lack of a partner – has dictated it; it’s a hard nonchoice.

You are currently at a tipping point in your life. Is this life the way you want it? Is this who you want to be? You now really feel the burning desire: you want to become a mother (again).

But that is at odds with the harsh reality:

a slinking egg supply/
a stressy and uncertain medical fertility process/
no partner or your partner who doesn’t want a child/
egg donation or/ and sperm donation coming near near/
already pregnant or a mother but a lot of remaining sadness and fears despite the joy you feel

It gradually undermines your feeling of happiness, but also your self-confidence, your ambitions, the flow in your life.

Research shows that the more successful you are as a woman, the more likely you are not to have a child—and possibly a partner—by midlife (!)

Are you still going for a plan for the future with a last chance baby?

Your heart’s desire versus your ratio

You are strong with your head. Light decisions are not for you.

Now you bump into this soul longing for a child. Your head tells you not to do this, but your heart bleeds if you don’t explore this path.

You notice that you can’t make this decision with your head. But listening to your heart? That almost feels unnatural, after all, your head has brought you this far.

Your minds longs for control, but this whole process is so uncertain. How do you cope?

But will your child be happy?

You allow yourself a fulfilled life, you are yearning for a child. But of course you also want your future child to feel completely happy and firmly rooted.

This is a heavy responsibility that rests on your shoulders. The critical, analytical thinker in you asks herself countless questions. It feels like a scary leap of faith.

 

Your time and energy are worth their weight in gold

Scrolling through Google and social media for hours, looking for information and experiences? Asking advice from other intended moms you don’t know in Facebook groups? Participating in group coaching with long Q&A video calls?

Honestly, you’re not up for it. Not time efficient  and not result-oriented.

What you want is an expert who accompanies you, unburdens you and saves you valuable time and energy and provides you with new perspectives.

Good news, soon you can have someone like that by your side.

 

Explore the 1:1 coaching programme

 

I took the plunge and made an appointment with a fertility clinic.

I kept waiting and waiting to fulfill my childwish. I am single and was wondering if I could handle this, especially in combination wit a busy job with irregular working hours. Moreover, I am strongly inclined to rationalize and to try to get things under control. Therefore I got completely stuck.

Throughout the coaching programma I learned to connect with my emotions and my desire. It got me out of my rational circle of thoughts. It helped met a lot that someone was guiding me in this and dared to ask me ‘hard’ questions,

Step by step, I let go of my inclination to take control. First in small things, but I’ll get there.

I dared to talk to my parents about my childwish and their supporting roll in this. This was a big and crucial step.

At the end of the coaching programme, I took the plunge and contacted a fertility clinic.

I wouldn’t have succeeded yet without the programme.

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